When Having Needs Feels Like A Problem

It’s common to ignore your own needs when you’ve been praised your whole life for being independent.

Or when asking for help wasn’t safe, or welcome.
Or when the people around you needed so much that it felt easier to just disappear into care-taking.

Over time, needing less became a habit. Then an identity.
And eventually, the discomfort of asking outweighs the discomfort of staying silent.

But silence comes with a cost.

It shows up as tension, detachment, over-functioning, and burnout.

You might not call it pain—but your body feels the pressure of carrying it alone.

Working with someone who gets it—a therapist, a counsellor, a trained listener—can help you look at this without shame.

Not to analyze it, or label it.
But to understand where it came from. And to learn how to live differently.

Having needs isn’t the problem. Believing you shouldn’t, is.